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Lazy Big Show and Rowan switch to Escalator Match
Punk-vs-Rousey confirmed for UFC 834
Punk quits UFC
CM Punk transitions from pro wrestling to fake sport
CM Punk return eminent, reports source who doesn’t know difference between eminent and imminent
Khali breaks silence on Cabana podcast to reveal why he grraag nwarhh smuh
WWE loses ratings war to Colt Cabana’s podcast
Lesnar defending championship nightly on indy circuit
Physicists prove time actually slows down during second hour of Raw
WWE title defense rule extended from 30 days to 300 days
Lesnar to portray Anonymous GM by continuing to no-show Raw
CM Punk return imminent, denies CM Punk
5 Hugely Important Things CM Punk Failed to Mention on Podcast
New dinosaur in Jurassic World revealed to be Funkasaurus
Crying wrestling fan confesses it’s no longer real to him, dammit
Jaded wrestling fans already bored with Sting’s WWE run
Sting mortified to learn he’s 13 years late for WCW invasion
Sting expected to hatch from mysterious giant egg
Sting to “definitely” appear at pay-per-view, confirms WCW Hotline in 1992
Sting confirmed for Survivor Series, reports some guy on internet
God, as witness, refutes exaggerations made by Jim Ross
Sunny stoops to the only business less classy than pro wrestling
Bret Hart suddenly signs up for Skype
American northeast buried, presumably by Triple H
